We’ve nearly reached the half a year mark since our grand voyage to the Caribbean, to the small little island of Tortola. I say half a year, but I like to round up or else it sounds a bit random, we’re actually at the 5 month check-point. For all of you that follow this blog or my social media channels, I can assure you it is just as dreamy as it looks in photographs. Paradise is incredibly photogenic.
This post is most certainly NOT rooting from complaint of my current situation as I am well aware that we’re living a tropical adventure. However, it’s totally ok to pine for certain luxuries that perhaps we took for granted before. Living so far from home can magnify exactly what it is we miss the most in our day-to-day lives. Don’t worry though, I don’t dwell on these for too long… it’s nothing a bit of rum and a full set of BBQ ribs can’t sort out. It’s wonderful to be thrown into a completely new environment and having to adapt to your new surroundings, I weirdly get a bit of a kick going to the supermarket and finding fruits and vegetables that I’ve never seen before let alone tasted. It certainly allows you to jazz things up in the kitchen a little bit. Although, when Christian cooks… this usually means adding jerk seasoning on virtually anything, he’s not allowed to make breakfast.
After a little time though, you do find your mind wandering to those delightful little luxuries that would just complete your World if you were to stumble across them. Not sure how that would work exactly, but I’m imagining a treasure chest being swept upon the shore. I kick the lock and it immediately opens (because that happens in films and Supermario games) revealing all my favourite things from home, all in perfect condition, within correct sell by dates and clothing in the correct sizes. What a dream. Of course, if Jack Sparrow, James Hook or Will Turner wanted to hand deliver the chest personally, I’d be ok with that… but, if it’s Blackbeard or Barbossa, think I’m busy that day.
I’ll waste no more time nattering away, here we go…
(in no particular order of favourites)
I didn’t want to get too emotional too quick but…
GODAMNIT IT MISS YOU! I miss our intimate joyous mornings. We’d greet the World together, you and I, along with our third posse member, Gold Blend. We were like the three Musketeers, ready to tackle the planet as the sun rose…!
I think of you almost daily. It sounds absurd to commit to a single breakfast food every single day, but I am the breed of human that likes a little stability in the mornings ok. It’s one less decision I have to make and it tastes more than exquisite so don’t you dare judge until you’ve sampled it. It has been suggested to me that perhaps I try to substitute with peanut butter. PEANUT BUTTER?! *spits out*. Nope, it’s just not the same and believe me I tried. My fantastic wonderful husband even managed to find me a brand called ‘Peter Pan’ in the hopes of bringing me round. The thought was heartfelt and appreciated and the jar really did have Peter Pan on it, but… the taste… not strong.
I’ve heard and seen via the trusty grapevine that cashew butter can indeed be found on the island. However, on that same grapevine I was also informed of the price tag. No way am I paying $27 for a jar, when I get through a jar a week. Pfft, no Sir! I can daydream nutty creamy dreams of perfection though right…?
Here it is (brand is important, it’s the best of the best and the only one that comes through my front door). I mean my actual front door, not a metaphor for my mouth.
This will sound absurd I know, but for those fellow appreciators of the dressing gown, understandable I hope. I miss my dressing gown. Perfect for either late night snuggles or to make a cup of coffee early in the morning, arm in arm and preferably with a hood makes the experience all the more enjoyable. I’m aware that this clothing item is far better suited for cosy cold evenings in, with the fire ablaze and a good film on, but I kind of didn’t quite twig that until I got here. You see, I treated myself to a brand new ‘White Company‘ dressing gown, complete with hood and sufficient length that allows for dignified sitting down (very important). I kept it wrapped and ribboned all the way here to Tortola, it even has it’s own section in the wardrobe. However, it is unwearable due to the fact that the general ongoing temperature here at all times of the day is ‘oven’. It now just hangs in the wardrobe, pristine and glistening in stark white, virtually untouched. It has to watch all the other clothes getting worn and even new ones being acquired. It’s ok, I have a plan. When the temperature here deems ‘unbearable’ I’ve decided I’m going to turn our air-con on so high (possible to the point of frost) that I’ll simply have to put it on and snuggle up.
This is a very particular, very special, scotch egg, not just your average every day scotch egg, no no! This is an M&S Gluten Free Scotch Egg. In the GF world it can be tricky to find anything that feels like a real ‘treat’ but I’ll never forget the first time I lay eyes on it, sat there, cool as anything in the supermarket refrigerator, right next to the GF sausage rolls and vegetable pots but if you’re at the guacamole you’ve gone too far. Nothing could distract me though, my eyes went straight for the balls (ewww, don’t be gross, there’s two in a pack, duh!). Love at first sight. They come in a pair and they are quite large so easily one would be enough, but… you have a choice, guzzle them both and feel proud of yourself OR I guess you could share and give the other one to someone else…
Either way, it’s divine! Could it be the succulent meat, the crispy breadcrumbs, the *struggles to find words* eggy egg? [Note to self, must come back and try to think of better phrasing. If this note is still here, I’ve failed].
Even if you’re not Gluten Free, I promise you’ll enjoy this. I’ve introduced this delight to many people and I’ve heard many a word uttered along the lines of “my goodness, yum! This tastes better than a fully glutenous scotch egg”, what better review could you want?
I didn’t want to put this in, but Floyd begged me to. So first and foremost I should probably inform you that this is not for human consumption. Not that you would ever want to, due to the ghastly smell. I have a feeling it’s only humans that have this view though because dogs seem to, pardon my French… lose their s**t when the can opens, so as much as we’re almost choked by the fishy waft and our own gag reflex… among dogs, it’s a real hit.
Our boy Floyd has always had a very delicate stomach since we brought him at eight weeks old. After many tummy aches, vomiting sessions and trips to the vet, we were recommended Chappie as it was very delicate on sensitive canine tums. With all the dog food brands we had tried, we had never seen him so excited when it was meal time. Sure enough, over time his stomach settled and it became the only brand we bought for him. Since moving here we initially tried a variety of foods but nothing settled, so of course, King Floyd was prescribed the vet’s special ‘sensitive tummy’ grub which costs around the same amount per month as a deposit on a house. It’s ok though, we love him. How can anyone not?
I’m embarrassed of this one, as no good thing can possible be absorbed from a glass of squash despite how little sugar they claim to be deficient in on the label. However, this is a weird childhood quirk that I just can’t squash (get it? get it?!)
As a child I was awful at drinking as much water as I should. My youngster thought process being that “if I’m not thirsty, why do I need to have a drink”, (consumption of alcohol is not in alignment with this logic). Anyway, it became a rule that with breakfast, I must consume a big glass of water by the time I leave the table. Totally not buzzing about the idea, a new and creative method was to be tried. I didn’t like squash and any of the available flavours, HOWEVER, I had developed a love for anything mango flavour. A cheeky drop of Robinson’s Orange and Mango was introduced to my morning H20 and the problem was solved. When I say a drop, I really do mean a drop, I only have about a spoonful of squash added to a pint of water and yet that’s super sweet to me. And so, in a super hot environment where I’m drinking even more water… I miss my squash. I’ve seen all the flavours here except for that one. Such a shame, because one bottle of the stuff seems to last me about a year… DANGIT!
I sense many a raised eyebrow of confusion over this one. It might not perhaps be among the most common of condiments but that does not mean it’s not as important to one’s kitchen cupboard (or fridge). As the name might suggest, it’s exactly what the name implies, a half mix of mayonnaise and bears. You mix the mayonnaise and bears in a bowl until smoothe, jar it up and boom! Not suitable for vegetarians due to the meat factor. Just kidding, it’s not really made of bears silly!
It’s the BEST sauce in the entire World and goes with a broad array of meals, from steak, to chips, nuggets, fish… I mean anything. I can’t think of a single meal that couldn’t be enhanced from a little dollop of Béarnaise on the side. So it’s similar to mayonnaise in terms of it being egg based but the secret ingredient is the tarragon, giving the identifiable green herby bits. My Mother can take full credit for my undying adoration of Béarnaise and I’ll be forever thankful. It is for this reason that it’s quite heartbreaking not to have it waiting for me in the supermarket aisles, both my plate of food and kitchen cupboard feel naked.
Béarnaise, I love you man.
Let’s not beat around the bush here (massive LOLZ), by underwear I’m talking about bras and knickers people. I have a very particular repetoir of underwear that passes the Emma test and is granted entry and dwelling into my knicker drawer. Needless to say, I have found none here. I miss being able to walk into any highstreet store, make a b-line for the underwear section and saying “oh wonderful, these are perfect, I’ll buy them”. If Christian was next to me, I imagine he would take this moment to inform me that I don’t ‘need’ any new underwear due to extreme over population of my knicker drawer. However, I would debate this. A lady requires many knickers as there are many TYPES needed for different occasions and each type must be acquired in more than one colour. Now that I think about it, and considering I own SO many, why is it such a challenge to match perfectly with a bra. Right, I need more bras…
This leads me on to my last point… the highstreet!
I miss you most of all my friend! The ease at which I could prance into any one of your delightful stores with my pick of product. Clothing, cosmetics, tech, food, shoes, cards, dog toys, cake, travel sickness pills, tampons, coffee, plants, Wellington boots, candles etc.
Mostly clothing though let’s be honest *sigh* I won’t dwell too much but… I will leave my current wish list here though, because it’s.just.so.pretty! Don’t get me wrong, it’s possible to order some brands and have them delivered here but the additional postage, shipment and importation tax is enough to make your eyes water. My point, is the ease at which you can have a shopping day and have all you wish in one place, on one street.
Thanks for taking the time to read this completely random article stemmed from a random afternoon here in paradise. It’s raining outside, I’m hungry and I just want to go to Costa coffee. Keep following the blog for more tales of island life here in Tortola.
(from top left)
Pick Flowers Not Fights T-Shirt: The Bee and Fox
White Lace Kimono: New Look
Black Belted White Dress: New Look
Pink Puff Sleeve Top: Zara
Disney ‘Beauty & The Beast’ Cup: Primark
Gold Silk Tie Blouse: Zara
Pink Blazer: Balmain, Paris
Pale Blue Lace Dress: ASOS
Flat Lobster Slippers: Kurt Keiger